How to Feel Your Soul in Life and at Work

How to Feel Your Soul in Life and at Work

The soul of you travels with you no matter where you are.  Your highest self represents the cord of consciousness that connects you and the Divine.  And the soul of you expresses this connection.

But how does this part of you show up when you are living all the normal and basic segments of your life? 

Can you be soulful everywhere you go?

Do you display the soul of you no matter who you are with?

Are you able to feel your soul at work?

It is almost impossible for you to be in flow and have your soul not shine through.  Though you may have your soul dampened through your travels in life.

I have lived a life where I just stayed in motion not feeling the world around me. 

To move through life because of obligation instead of inspiration can be a dark path.

But to live soulfully is to bring color to your day.  It brings life to an otherwise bane existence.

For this reason, it is important to tap in and know what makes your soul come alive.

Allow yourself to feel your soul and express it fully. And understand what it means to be living.

This can happen anywhere in life and certainly should be permitted space to exist at work.

But your question may be how?

First, before we can reach this goal, let’s define the path that you are on. Knowing first the composition of your soul leads to understanding your soul’s expression.

What is the Soul?

There are many definitions of soul.  And there are many reasons why this is.

More than religion and dogma, the idea of the soul represents an intangible experience that cannot be singularly defined.

For this reason, if asked, we each likely will give a different interpretation.

However, despite this, there are many that come together in like-mindedness.

Soul is the expression of our spiritual connection with life.  It is the experience of being, doing, receiving, or emoting while at the same time ascending to different levels of ecstatic joy.

Soulfulness is to be full of soul and to allow the dams to break with the emotions that arise because of the experience.

It is a form of bliss and also a oneness with whatever form of the world with which you have connected to synergize your joy.

The power of tapping in with your soul is uniquely significant and for this reason important. 

It transcends logic and practical understanding and instead connects with our higher level receiving of intuition, spiritual guidance, and exploration through emotion.

It is a Divine power and one that each of us possesses if we choose to honor the connection.

Happiness resides not in possessions, and not in gold, happiness dwells in the soul.


Can You Exist Without Soul?

If you define soul as your spirit, you may then state that it is impossible to live without your soul. 

For some, these terms are used interchangeably. 

In this definition, the soul becomes the spark of life that exists only when the breath of life is still in you.  When you lose your breath of life, your soul/spirit ceases to exist.

However, if soul and spirit are not intertwined in this way an alternative conclusion can evolve.

If spirit is itself the breath of life, then the soul is the joyous expression that exists because of it. 

In this case, spirit becomes the signal that ignites the soul to shine through the body. 

And the body is the vessel that acts as transmitter of the soul. 

In this alternate definition, you have a spirit that resides within the body and the soul that is the expression of this connection through emotion.  

This emotion is stimulated and called through by our observation and connection with our internal or external world, or both.

However, even though the soul connection is wholly present, it is possible for you to exist without the soul’s expression.

Many live their lives in absence of honoring this connection. 

You can willfully deny yourself the acknowledgment of this soul connection and therefore disallow its transmission through you.

It is also possible to break your soul connection with your highest self.  This occurs by becoming more attuned to the pain or mundane aspects of the world.

When you abandon your desire to feel your soul’s connection you can live in its absence.

But the question is whether this is a life well-lived.

To permit your soul’s expression you must be a willing participant.  Only in this way, can you feel the magnitude of the power of your soul’s full expression.

In your exploration of life and all that the world contains, you can find what ignites your soul.  But to reach your soul’s full expression, you may be led on a journey.

Until you find what sparks the soul connection for you, it may feel as if you are living in absence of your soul.

How Do You Feel Your Soul?

You can feel your soul in willing consciousness to absorb the potential of joy around you.  It can be as simple as exploring experiences that you like.

Cherish your visions and your dreams as they are the children of your soul, the blueprints of your ultimate achievements.

Napoleon Hill

There is a reason why there is soul food.  Or that you may say something touches your soul.  You can claim someone as your soulmate.  And feel a sense of belonging with others at the soul level.

It is the deep resonance with your internal knowing of self, the external stimulation of the world around, and a significant emotional connection that defines the feeling of soul.

The trail of positive experiences brings with it an understanding of what stimulates joy in you.  This definition of joy is unique to you as only you can fully experience the emotion that comes through you in life.

The soul expression is a deeper and more vibrant emotion than all others.

Here is where you feel transcended from the awareness of all aspects of life and become fully attentive to that which ignites your soul only.

The power of the connection with your spirit, your body, and your experience creates an ascended emotion that transcends joy or normal pleasure. 

It is in this a complete absence of the sensation of separation.  All things are one, spirit, soul, and life experience.  And the emotion is what could be described as a highest good through this synergy.

Can You Feel Your Soul at Work?

The experiences that can cause you to personally transcend and your soul to come alive can happen anywhere including work.

It is also possible and acceptable to express yourself in a soulful manner in the workplace.

Don’t worry of conflict. 

You can experience your soul’s expression and simultaneously abide by any rules or expectations that your job may place upon you.

Your soul is a gift.  And when the interactions or content of your work invokes joy within your spirit, it can be a gift for many to share in.

You can find your soul at work when you are being creative.  It can be sparked through artwork, design, new ideas, and bold innovation.

You can discover your soul through other people, in meaningful and compassionate interactions, and even through share of your knowledge.

The soul can be ignited when you present, when you draw out emotions like excitement and motivation, or when you allow yourself to be the source of inspiration.

Your job can become a wonderful playground of different experiences that create a soulful exchange with others or soulful experiences for yourself.  

How Do I Ignite My Soul at Work?

Your job can be a great place to connect with your spirit and to call out new definition of soul expression for you.

In the very beginning when you are searching for a job, it is important to look for more than just a source of income.

What calls to you as the right place for you to be?  How are you inspired to think, create, share, or build? 

Who feels like family to you (if that is meaningful to you).  And who, at the same time, feels like a team of collaborators toward something greater together?

You can only know what job is right for you when you listen to how your spirit speaks to you through your soul.  Logic can only take you part of the way.

It takes time to learn how to listen to something more.

Any work environment can be your stage for soul connection and expression.

You may find new interests or experiences that bring out new emotions.  Or you may be able to deepen your interest and find new depths to your soul expression.

It is important to make your emotions as important as your other goals and objectives.

Be open to try new experiences, talk to new people, or even have different types of discussions than what you have had in the past.

Search for what is truly important to you.

You may not always be motivated by money or titles or travel.  And following the advice of others who do not share your motivations can inadvertently lead you away from your soul’s calling.

Follow your intuition and let your spirit be your guide. 

You will know that you are on the right path when your soul glows an unexplainable but good feeling upon you.   It is as if you just smile for no reason at all.   

You don’t have to find your soul at work but there is nothing that limits you from finding it there.

Can You Use Soul Language at Work?

The language of the soul is one that steadily becomes more familiar but not necessarily wholly accepted.

When you speak about your desire to feel at a soul level it can feel out of place in some work settings.

But take heed. When on your journey to learn your internal language with your spirit, it is not necessary to communicate it with others.

Your connection with your soul’s expression is one that is personal to you and only you.  While others can identify with the feeling, no one but you can sense your own emotions.

Because of this, it is important to be selective with whom you share your soul’s journey.

What you may elect to do instead is to be more transparent about how you feel.

Be open to say when you agree with a direction or a thought someone shares.  Be equally open to say when you disagree.

Honor your own opinions and be willing to respectfully disagree with others.  Or champion ideas that you love and support those that have them.

Practicing self-expression is one method to attune yourself to your internal voice.

Validating to yourself what you think and feel allows you to become more genuine when identifying your independent perspective.

When you master this understanding of yourself, it becomes easy to then follow the path of what truly makes you happy.

Speak authentically and by default you will be speaking your soul language.


Your soul is the means to express the connection that exists between your body and your spirit by way of emotion.

The soul of you represents the depth of you and acts as an indescribable knowing and resonance when you interconnect with the world around you and within you.

There is no limitation to what can stimulate the feeling of synchronicity and joyfulness that comes from the soul.  And it can exist anywhere including in your work.

Be authentic and willing to express yourself genuinely and fully.  Take on new experiences or find new ways to enjoy past experiences with new eyes and renewed interest. 

Explore your work environment with the expectation that your soul can be ignited by what you find around you. 

And feel comfort that your opportunity for soul connection is limitless at work and anywhere else your journey takes you.  

Do you know what makes your soul sing? Have you stumbled into a blissful moment? Do you have a soul connection with the work that you do? Share your story in the comments below and ignite the soul’s expression in someone else.

How to Commit to Your Commitments

How to Commit to Your Commitments

Some people live by keeping their commitments. Unfortunately, others suffer through them.

When breaking promises go from an occasional mishap to a regular occurrence, it can create havoc in your life.

Before you know it your integrity becomes questionable, your promises become meaningless, and your good intentions are forgotten.

What’s worse is that keeping commitments can be a real challenge for you.

It may not be as simple as just starting to commit better. But instead, it may take more extensive time to understand your flaws and create new and better habits.

For those who do not suffer with keeping commitments, it may not be easily understood why it is hard for you. Some people just keep commitments naturally.

So try not to get too focused on others when trying to figure out yourself.

Instead, focus on yourself and your desire for personal improvement as most important.

Work to overcome your commitment challenges and create a real change in your life for the better.

Why Is Keeping Commitments So Hard?

Keeping commitments is hard when you don’t have the desire, ability, or motivation to do it.

Particularly when you have options that are easier or feel better than the commitment in front of you.

You may have committed to getting up early and helping someone move. But staying in bed and sleeping longer is much more attractive and easier than any of that.

When you commit to things that you really don’t want to do, you essentially are forcing your body to move through what your mind does not accept.

Some may say your commitment is more important than your personal pleasure. But tell your mind and body that when you are fighting your way out of bed.

There can also be times that you make a commitment that you simply shouldn’t have.

You may have over-extended yourself or misjudged your capability or availability. Therefore the structure of your commitment was faulty from the beginning.

There is also the occasion where you commit as a courtesy. Even when you don’t want to do it, your compassion for the other person persuades you to say you will.

The issue here can be that your emotion is short-lived. And when faced with taking action, your momentum has already died off.

You may still have love and compassion for the person you made the promise to. But that emotion does not transition into fuel to do the task or motivation to keep the promise.

Desire, motivation, availability of time or energy, and even a lapse in memory can all contribute to broken promises and failed commitments.

And with all these obstacles on the trail, it can simply be hard to keep up.

But that doesn’t mean that commitment isn’t important. Or that you should be resolved of having or keeping commitments because it is difficult to do.

Benefits of Keeping Your Commitments

Keeping your commitments can benefit you with an overall sense of increased life satisfaction.

When you make a commitment and see it through, you will gain more self-respect and self-confidence.

Repeatedly failing to keep commitments, however, can cause you to feel like a failure, unreliable, and undependable to you.

Remember, not all promises are to others. You also can make and break promises with yourself.

This can impact your confidence to try new things, take on challenges, or make decisions without the co-sign of another person.

You simply don’t trust yourself more than you trust another actually reliable person.

It is important to know that you can rely on yourself and your own capabilities.

Believe that you have the ability to generate the mindset, thoughts, and behaviors to achieve your goals.

There are also benefits to others of your learning how to keep commitments and following through on what you say you’re going to do.

Keeping commitments will impact the feeling of safety and security others have with you. Others trust you to honor your word, be present when needed, or essentially walk it like you talk it.

A person who honors their promises is honest and possesses integrity. At least this is a common perception. Adopting this behavior extends this perception to you.

It can also be the way that others interpret you as loving and caring towards them.

Committing to tasks, requests, and obligations is not easy and even harder to do with regular consistency.

But learn to appreciate the personal and interpersonal benefits of changing your habits and keeping commitments.

Experience greater optimism in your ability to self-improve and confidence in taking on new responsibilities. Really know and believe yourself to be a person who gets things done.

Examining If You Are Ready to Be More Committed

As with any habit or behavior change, to become more committed you first need to acknowledge your obstacles.

Are you disorganized?

Do you suffer from people-pleasing too much?

Do you make too many commitments?

Are you easily distracted or have trouble saying no?

It is important to be honest with yourself in order to find the root of your problem.

From there, you can develop a plan on how to improve.

Take some time to sit down and figure out what is holding you back. Once you know your obstacles, you can start to work on developing solutions.

Examining who you are as a person and how you manage your life, in general, can help you gain an understanding of how your keep on top of your usual daily tasks.

You can also learn how you already address unexpected or adverse situations.

Do you tend to figure things out on your own?

Or do you lean on others to get your objectives done?

These details make a difference.

Because if you are not always equipped to keep yourself in order or honor your personal commitments to yourself, you likely are not going to spontaneously develop this skill for others.

Once you have a better handle on who you are and how you handle your life, you can put this knowledge to use in building your new “keeping commitments strategy”.

How to Improve Your Commitment Skills

No matter where you are on your readiness scale, there are some tips that you can put into place today to help you be more committed and conquer keeping your promises more frequently.

-Set smaller goals rather than making grandiose plans that are difficult to keep up with

-Review your intended commitment, with yourself or the other person, to determine exactly how you will get the task accomplished before making a promise to get it done

-Visualize the successful outcome of keeping your commitment

-Talk about your commitment out loud to assist with memory recall of what’s on your to-do list

-Find an accountability partner who will help you stay on track

-Write down all significant details of your commitment in a prominent place including the deadline

-Set reminders in your electronic calendar

A Bonus Tip on Using Planning to Improve Commitment

If you find that you often start projects with the best of intentions but then fail to follow through, planning may be your issue.

Using a planner can be an excellent way to record all of your intended tasks, keep them organized, and to serve as a reminder when your day gets busy.

Organizing your planner by separating out your priorities can also be helpful.

For example, you might have a section for work commitments, family commitments, and personal commitments.

This will help you see at a glance what needs to be done, when, and for who.

It can also help to keep your non-negotiable commitments in one place so that you can easily refer to them.

Using a planner on a regular basis, reviewing it at a regular interval, and checking off your tasks when completed can create significant order in your life.

For those that suffer with meeting commitments due to disorganization or frequent memory lapses, using a planner can be a game-changer!

Transitioning Into a Committed Person

If you have been pretty poor on keeping commitments for some time, it is likely that you not only have a poor image of yourself around commitment but others do too.

It is important not to lose your momentum for improvement because of your past. And even more important that you don’t let negative self-talk or others’ comments take you away from your goal.

Keep focused on your end-game and reflect on any positive changes that you make in keeping commitments along the way, big or small.

If you feel that your past broken commitments have caused tension with others that you care about in your life, let them know that you are actively working on improvement.

Listen to any suggestions that others may have for you on your new commitment journey. And don’t shy away from taking responsibility for your past actions so as to work actively on rebuilding trust.

No one is perfect in all aspects of their life, but take heed that working on improving yourself and improving your relationship with others is worthwhile and commendable.


Keeping commitments is an important way of showing up for yourself and others. By committing to your commitments fully you demonstrate integrity to others and build self-confidence within yourself.

Being honest about what you are capable of doing and understanding how you manage your life obligations overall can support you in your endeavors to be a better-committed person overall.

Start small, be consistent, and share your intentions and your wins with others. Building the habit of commitment may take diligence but the wins are worth the effort.

What are your thoughts? Have you come up with ideas to improve how you commit to your commitments since reading this blog post? Let us know in the comments below!

How to Know and Keep Your Built-In Best Friend

How to Know and Keep Your Built-In Best Friend

Not everyone has to go on a pilgrimage to find their best friend. Some situations and circumstances create the opportunity built-in.

Built-in best friends have the good fortune to know that they already share a basis for potential true friendship. They already share space, an interest, or even family members to start.

However, it is up to them to cultivate this potential into a reality.

Yes, even right now you may have a potential built-in best friend right in front of you. 

Recognize your built-in best friend in your life. See why their relationship is important for you. And learn how to nurture your connection.

Growing friendships is an important aspect of your overall social and mental well-being.

Acknowledging your built-in best friends cannot only demonstrate to you the richness of connection that you already have. 

It can also give opportunity to further expand on the great relationship you already know.

What Makes Your Best Friend Built-In?

A built-in best friend is a special edition best friend friendship.  The relationship may be very similar to any other best friend scenarios.

But what makes it just a little different is that you are already bound to this individual for another separate reason.

Fate brought you together to be in close proximity, spend extensive time, or otherwise be connected for things that did not require a close friendship. 

However, it inadvertently created a fertile ground for friendship just the same.

This built-in connection can be a close family member like a brother or sister, a favorite cousin, or even your mom or dad. 

It can also be a teammate, a co-worker, a mentor, or your boss. 

These relationships have been established because of other life circumstances. 

You already have a basis to connect with this person more than others in the world.

But this connection did not necessitate that you would become more.  Again, it simply served as your fertile ground of opportunity.

Friendships grow from much more than proximity, however.  You become friends because of:

  • Shared trust
  • Mutual respect
  • Love, compassion, and care
  • Supporting and encouraging each other
  • Listening and being attentive to each other, and
  • Finding more and more opportunities to connect in unique and special ways

All of these attributes and more create friendship bonds. 

Now add your close proximity AND that you share these connections with no one else in the same way.

This is how built-in best friends are formed.

How Do I Know If I Am My Best Friend’s Best Friend?

In any close friend relationship, it is not always necessary to put names, titles, or other labels around it.

 You can simply enjoy the closeness for what it is.

However, like any other title of honor, it can feel special to know that your best friend will name you in this way.

If you haven’t heard the words, check for other indications that your feelings for each other are mutual:

  • Do you talk regularly about highly private or sensitive subjects?
  • Are you the first one called for special events or accomplishments?
  • Is it automatically assumed that if one of you shows up for an event the other one is likely there too?
  • Do other people refer to you both as best friends?

While this list is not exhaustive, they are each good indicators that your relationship is pretty strong.

It is uncommon that a person will share all of these actions with more than one person.

But Am I THE BEST Friend?

There may be a small part of you that wonders if you are the one and only best friend.

No matter your age or your background, there is someone about that number one spot that makes anyone feel extra special.

The reality is that it is very possible for a person to have more than one uniquely close relationship. 

Many married couples will call their spouse their best friend and still have another best friend in their life as well.  (There has to be someone to complain about their spouse to!)

That said, being the one and only may not happen.  But it doesn’t mean that your relationship is not valuable or needed.

Take queues from what you see as the strengths in your relationship.  And if you still have doubts, muster up the courage and just ask.

You may find that by putting your feelings on the table openly you reach yet another level of bonding with your best friend.

How to Nurture Your Built-In-Best-Friend Friendship

Anything that you want to keep alive needs nurturing and care.  A best friend friendship is no different than anything else.

Built-in-best-friend friendships can sometimes be neglected because they appear to come into your life easily and seamlessly.  

You already live with your best friend, for example, so why would you need to schedule any additional time to spend with them.

Or you already work together, so why would you need to talk to them about work goals or stresses when you’re at home too.

While your relationship may be strong, it is never a bad idea to continue to nurture your relationship to ensure it stays strong.

  • Be attentive to your best friend and their needs beyond just the ones you usually talk about
  • Schedule time outside of your automatic habitat and explore how your friendship functions in different environments
  • Be willing to support their healthy relationships with other people in their lives and be a trusted confidant when other relationships struggle or break.
  • Most of all, be loving, caring, compassionate, thoughtful, and present as any good friend would be

You are best friends for a reason. 

You already share a unique closeness and resonance with each other unparalleled with other people in each other’s lives. 

But don’t rest on it being automatic that you will maintain that level of closeness as you both evolve on your separate life journeys. 

Be mindful to nurture your relationship so that you can continue to ensure its closeness for a long time to come.

How to Mend a Broken Built-In-Best-Friend Friendship

Built-in-best-friend friendships are a little different than your average friendship. 

You are tied in with this person beyond your friendship alone.

Siblings may still live together at their parents’ house.  Boss and co-workers have to see each other every business day no matter what. 

You can imagine that a friendship gone bad can have damaging effects on both the couple and others in their environment. 

No one wants a war where you have to pick sides between one sister or another.  And you certainly don’t want a broken-hearted boss doing your annual review!

While there are many who would suggest choosing your friends wisely to avoid these cumbersome backlashes to friendship, avoiding these relationships is not always the answer.

Best friends fight.  That is just a fact.

And who else can hurt you more than someone you truly love.

When going through tough times, it is important to remember that not only the two of you but others can be affected.  To minimize the collateral damage, try to deploy a little diplomacy:

  • Try not to share your ugly details with others who share space in your same environment, such as at home, at work, amongst team members, etc.
  • Remember that all emotions including anger, disappointment, or betrayal are fleeting.  Try not to say or do anything that will be regretted once the emotions pass, such as quitting a job or breaking a lease.
  • Be understanding that others may also have care and love for your friend so do not try to create a smear campaign
  • If you do share the dirty details with others and they sympathize with you significantly, remember that others may not get over what you do.  So, when your friendship is rekindled, they may still harbor ill feelings for your best friend and it may tarnish everyone’s shared environment

Aside from being considerate of those who share a similar environment with you and your best friend, it is ultimately important to focus on the friendship.

In any broken relationship, it is important to consider the bigger picture and not just the immediate incident.

You have a unique and special bond with your best friend.  Is it worth throwing away all that you have become together for the problem in front of you now?

Speak to each other with love.  Be open-minded and willing to listen.  Acknowledge if you need space or silence to heal.  But above all things, try to work through to resolution based on the best of your relationship and not the worst.

This is a friendship meant to be built-in.  There is nothing gained in tearing down the house you live in.  


A built-in best friend is one where you have been given a unique opportunity to create closeness with someone already in your world. 

It didn’t have to happen.  But you and your best friend became open, shared deeply, and from this grew a love and a special bond.

And all of this was fortunate to have happened in a shared environment or circumstance. This permitted you to spend more time, share more experiences, and to take your relationship further faster.

Nurturing your friendship, even outside of the ready-made environment that you share, can help your relationship deepen and grow.  Be conscious that the ups and downs of your relationship can have impact on you and others in your environment too. 

Remember even built-in best friends go through the occasional tough time.  But no small dispute is worth diminishing the bond you have that should be treasured. 

You are family, co-workers, teammates, or parent and child.  Whatever the relationship, you are more than just best friends and that will forever make your relationship uniquely different and special.

Life brought you together so that you both could benefit from knowing each other.  So mend any broken fences quickly, treasure all your special moments, and remember always that you have a unique and loving friendship….specially built-in.  

Are you looking for ways to enhance other relationships in your life? The most important relationship to nurture first is your relationship with yourself. Check out The Perfect Self-Love Tips to Change Your Life or 7 Ways to Create Balance in Your Imbalanced Life and explore ways to love yourself more. Both you and those you love will blossom as you grow to become more.

How to Stop Hurting Yourself When Helping Others

How to Stop Hurting Yourself When Helping Others

When you possess a natural helping spirit, you give to others in the most supportive way as part of who you are.  And your intent is always to be of true and genuine help.

But, unfortunately, the best intentions can land differently than expected.  And you not only can connect poorly with another but also give so much that you hurt yourself.

Examine who you are as a helper.  Acknowledge both your gifts and your challenges.  And become an even better helper to yourself and everyone else in the process.

Why Helping Your Calling

Not everyone has the helping spirit.  Even the nicest individuals may be focused on other deeds than helping others.  Or, more often, nice people do not realize how much they help others and do not call themselves helpers.

But some of us gain a genuine joy in helping and supporting. 

To provide a helping hand to a person and animal or even the environment when needed sparks an indescribable joy and energy that lights you up.

It does not matter if you get a thank you or if anyone knows that you helped at all.  You know and that is all that matters. 

Your knowing is enough to gain new energy and that feel-good feeling of being of service.

Charitable givers, volunteers, mentors, teachers, donators….the list of titles is lengthy and so are all the good works that come from those that help. 

You are called to perform these actions because you feel a sense of purpose in sharing your gifts with others. 

The calling, or knowing, is that you are supposed to provide what you have to others in order to positively impact another’s well-being. 

And your calling is confirmed in the positivity you gain in the process. 

Helping others is an absolute and unquestioned mission for you.  

What Helping Excellence Looks Like

Whether you are in a helping profession or you are simply a helpful person, you innately strive for excellence in your brand of giving.

Helping excellence takes many forms but starts with the unique ability to combine being introspective, extrospective, and compassionately empathetic. 

When you are introspective you not only know yourself but acknowledge your skills, abilities, or assets of value.  You honor yourself in knowing that you have worth that is worth sharing.

To be extrospective is to demonstrate that you are attentive to absorbing the world around you.  You pay attention to your surroundings and even look beyond your immediate view to understand the context of life and your place in it.

But the key that binds is your compassionate empathy.  This is where all your gifts truly synchronize.

You see your gifts of worth, interpret the needs outside of yourself, and extend yourself to give selflessly to bridge the gaps.  

You understand how you can be a solution and are compelled to make yourself available as a resource.

This remarkable talent and example of character and humanity are what sets helpers apart from all others.  It is a form of excellence that gives true purpose to your body, mind, and spirit.  

Happy Helper vs. People Pleaser

Giving of your talents with heartfelt compassion can be a beautiful experience for both the giver and the receiver.

However, there are times that while a helper can give with the best of intentions, it is not a healthy exchange.

The reality is that helping feels good but when an attempt to help fails, it can feel horrible.

You may have created the perfect solution, but you were impatient to capture all details so you missed the true mark.

It is possible that the receiver of your kind acts was not in the heart space to receive your assistance well.  And instead took your act of kindness as an act of pity or condescending behavior.

You could have had the best and most thoughtful plan, but may have missed the mark on timing.

And while mistakes happen as a normal part of life, when helping fails it can make you feel disconnected and unsure of your ability to give well.

The Birth of a People Pleaser

People pleasing can appear very similar to being a helper but can take a more negative turn if you are not self-aware.

The nature of people-pleasing is that you take specific actions to ensure the result of making another person happy.  It can become toxic when you will take action regardless of the negative impact on your person.

Some people develop this pattern at a very young age, attempting to please overly strict or aggressive parents or other influencers. 

Others develop this behavior as a result of their work or school environments as a means to ensure positive achievement or acknowledgment.

But often failed helpers will turn into people pleasers.  Particularly if a helper has inadvertently experienced a significant instance or pattern of failed attempts to help.

Having experienced a negative or even angry response to their extended help, a helper may overextend looking for ways to fix the failure or make the person happy.

What is worse is that it is hard for an innate helper to see the difference between helping with genuine positive intent or helping for personal gain.

Helpers become people pleasers when they find themselves desperately trying to calm their own anxiety in displeasing someone else. 

They can also become overly focused on being seen or treated in a positive way in response to their giving.

This unhealthy and imbalanced excessive preoccupation with giving can be detrimental to your mental health, financial stability, or your physical well-being.

When helping hurts then somewhere the helping excellence equation has been thrown off balance.

What to Do When Helping Hurts

The hurts from overhelping can be reversed.  Depending on the length of time this pattern has gone unchecked, it can take time.

All helpers should develop the habit of being a good giver to themselves.

This is represented by an honest self-assessment of whether or not helping still feels good.  And also recognition of whether or not you are still a happy giver.

More often than you may want to admit, helping can start to feel bad.  You give when you are tired or when your resources are too low to sustain yourself.

You may also develop an obsessive tendency to gain positive feedback from others or your own personal dopamine charge from the act of helping.

The habit of giving turned into a giving compulsion can have significant detrimental effects on you.

Dedicate time to the practice of self-care.  Know and embody the understanding that only when your tank is full can you give to others at your best.

If being an expert helper is your goal, then respect that only a healthy helper can excel at helping. 

Also, to give when you are not at your best degrades the quality of what you give.

And a true helper wants to give to another the best that they have to offer always.

While it may seem counter-intuitive and hard to retrain, giving to yourself first makes your helping stronger and more effective.  

Great Helpers Accept Help

Another means to support your helping health is to lean on others.

Having people that you love and trust tell you when you may be going too far is important.  In the midst of your helping frenzy, you may lose yourself in the process. 

An accountability partner can assist in providing you with another point of view regarding your personal well-being status.

Seasoned helpers can have a never-ending list of ideas on how to help.  It is also essential to seize the opportunity to let others be expert doers when you may be a visionary expert.

You do not have to have the vision and make it happen all by yourself.

Permitting others to be a part of the process is another form of giving. 

Through your vision and inspiring energy, you create opportunities for others to participate in the helping process.

Because you know how to give you provide an excellent opportunity to teach others and to create more helping hands for the future.

Related Article:  How to Energize and Maximize Your Giving Spirit

Keeping Your Passion for Helping

If you are a natural helper but suffering from helpers’ burnout you may find yourself in the strange place of needing a charge to your helping spirit.

You may also be trying to balance your self-care with your care for others for the first time and feel confused in the process.

Be reminded and take pride that your unique gifts serve the world in a special way and continue to be needed.

Give yourself permission to experience all the benefits that your helping gift provides to others and yourself:

  • Reflecting on positive past experiences where you well demonstrated your gift of help.  See the smiles and gratitude in others and remember your own feelings of gratification.
  • Save any memories of gratitude you may receive such as cards, gifts, or smiling photos, and review them as part of your self-care regimen.  Congratulate yourself for all the help you have extended to others.
  • Affirm to yourself how you have grown to be an excellent helper and all the ways that you help others.  You are not the same person you were when you helped for the first time. Your helping gifts are likely overflowing when you truly reflect on all of them.
  • Have close friends and confidants to confide in when you feel unsure and let others remind you of your beautiful spirit.  Don’t worry. They won’t think you are being prideful.  The best partners know when you need a boost and will be more than happy to remind you how truly wonderful you are.  And you deserve to hear it, especially when you need it.
  • Take a moment just to be grateful.  Be thankful for your helping gifts and talents and all the experiences that they have provided you.  You have been given an exceptional way to live your life and not everyone can experience what helping as given to you.


If you are a natural helper then you should know that you possess a unique gift of giving to others. 

That gift is worth special care and attention as it serves an important need to the world.  No matter how big or small your contribution, your help can be critical to another.

Knowing how to give to yourself so that you are in the best mental, physical, and spiritual health to help is important.  And recognizing the signs when you need to receive help is just as important as the help you give.

Balancing your view of yourself, all that surrounds you, and the empathetic compassion that you extend to others can be challenging at times. 

But when you master this synchronicity, you can excel in living your purpose and helping others to the best of your ability.

How to Use Journaling Prompts for Self-Worth

How to Use Journaling Prompts for Self-Worth

Self-worth journaling prompts can assist when knowing your self-worth does not come easy.  That knowing and acceptance can be hard for many of us.

In our early beginnings, we may learn self-worth based on the reaction and input of others. 

Before our language, critical thought, and interpretation mature we may look to others for our definition of value.

And based on others’ definitions, we may see certain aspects of ourselves as worthy or unworthy.

Through the years as we grow, we then begin to create our own definitions. 

Now coming into an understanding of ourselves, we may seek self-worth but not always have it.  The patterns of thoughts and beliefs received from others can train an unworthy automatic response.

We see ourselves as less than others.  Our ideas and opinions become insignificant due to the reaction or opinion of others. 

The ability to have what we want, do as we want, or be who we want is decided by something other than ourselves.

To reclaim our place of prominence in our own lives, it is necessary that we know and live in accordance with our own sense of worth.

Why Is Self-Worth Important?

Having self-worth at its very basic level is represented by our self-care.  To act as if you are of worth or value means to provide care toward yourself as if you are of value.

This can start as simple as basic personal hygiene, nutrition, how you rest, and how you attend to any personal problem or ailment. 

It can also be represented by how you speak to yourself, acknowledge your strengths and positive attributes, or simply love yourself out loud.

Do you take care of yourself? 

Do you prioritize your well-being?

Are you worthy of care?

Do you see acknowledging your self-worth as important?

The importance of self-worth is that you are the lead of your own definition.  You live life in accordance with how you define you want to live it.

In living as you deem right for you, you honor your feelings, your interpretation of yourself, and your opinion. 

When you take accountability and ownership for who and what you are in accordance with your definition, you essentially create you.

Having self-worth benefits you because with it you are wholly created in your own defined self-image. 

You can define the parameters and live as healthy as you choose mind, body, and spirit. 

How Does Journaling Support Your Self-Worth?

Journaling provides an opportunity to record your own thoughts and ideas.  It is a method to capture what you think and believe without outside interference. 

Your thoughts and ideas may have been influenced by others. 

However, through journaling, you have the opportunity to express any thought and to examine if you want to hold it as true or important to you.

Rather than live through auto-pilot, journaling permits the opportunity to pause and reflect on the thoughts that come to you.

Using the journaling process, you can consider the subject of your self-worth and your personal thoughts, ideas, and feelings on all aspects of your lie.

With this self-examination, you can determine where you feel vulnerable or misaligned in your life.  How much have you permitted the outside world to misdirect your internal thoughts of yourself?

Decide if you want to address these insecurities and improve your personal well-being.

Even if you are unwilling to change, you can make peace with your vulnerabilities and embrace who you are with them.

If you do not like your vulnerability and the emotions that come with it, you can choose to make a conscious and intentional plan of improvement.

On either path, journaling can serve as a resource.

You can write where you are, where you would like to be, and your plan for the journey in-between.

With regular journaling, you can unlock how you walk your life’s path and identify if you need to change direction on a daily basis.

What Are Journaling Prompts for Self-Worth?

Journaling prompts for self-worth help to inspire thoughts around your definition of self-worth and self-value.

With this inspiration, you have the opportunity to evaluate how you define your value to yourself. 

You can bring clarity to the actions you take or withdraw from based on your self-opinion. Look closely to determine if you have patterns that do not serve you or that are made primarily to please others at your expense.

You will discover that even the smallest daily actions can be clues to define how your define your personal value.

There are no absolute rules to self-worth other than the ones that you make for yourself.

You may find what you have learned as self-worth in the past is not what you agree with as your definition today. 

Determine if you actually have a definition but maybe you are not practicing it actively in your life. 

You may also learn that there are situations in your life where you honor your self-worth well. It is important to identify, intentionally repeat, and honor these practices.  

Journaling prompts targeted specifically around self-worth will help to call out these situations and give you space to reflect upon them. 

In this way, while you will use prompts to begin the internal conversation, you will lead the way to your own self-discovery.

20 Journaling Prompts for Self-Worth

  1. What is the best compliment you have given yourself or received from someone else?
  2. What is important to you in life?
  3. Without overthinking it, what is your opinion of yourself?
  4. What is your biggest accomplishment and how did you achieve it?
  5. What are the best attributes of your closest friends?  Do you share the same ones?
  6. Who do you admire the most and why? Do you have similar characteristics?
  7. What do you do that makes you most proud?
  8. What is an example of you at your best?
  9. If you could be, do, or have anything in world, what is top on your wish list? Why?
  10. Do you take time to care for yourself?
  11. In what ways are you exceptional?  In which ways do you want to be exceptional?
  12. When you love and/or respect someone else, how do you show it?
  13. The last time you took care of yourself, what did you do and how did you feel about it?
  14. If you made a self-date, what would you do?
  15. What do you aspire to be?  Do you believe you are capable of being what you dream? Why?
  16. What positive statement do you say to yourself often? If you made a new one, what would it be?
  17. What is the first thing that comes to mind when you think of your strengths?
  18. When have you truly showed your kindness?
  19. What is it like to be your friend?
  20. What is your definition of self-worth? Do you live this definition?

Responding to Your Journal Prompts

You can utilize the journal prompts here, research others, or make your own. 

In all cases when responding to your journal prompts, you want to be open and honest with yourself.

Some questions may seem easy and straightforward, others may be difficult to answer.  You may find it easy to reflect upon the positives in your past but not in your now. 

Sometimes you will not find your positive attributes right on the surface. But searching for even the smallest compliment can cause more to come to light.

When it’s hard to compliment yourself or recall positive interaction with others, for example, don’t skip the prompt.  Instead, look at the situation deeper.

How would you like things to be?

What would be an ideal outcome?

How can you impact your now so that what you truly want becomes your now or your future?

Taking these steps helps to uncover your definition and crystalize your ideas of self-worth and how it applies to you.

To this end, when you have good experiences, memories, or thoughts of yourself, do not shy away from them. 

Spend time on the subject.

 Write pages and pages if you can. 

Take the time to bask in what is brilliant about you. 

This time taken to relish in the best parts of you helps to further strengthen the foundation of your self-worth.


Self-worth journal prompts can help to define your values, your opinions, and essentially your voice in the world.

When you have a solid definition created by you of your self-worth, it helps you define who and what you are. 

Your valuing of yourself is what makes you healthy, mind, body, and spirit. And it helps you to healthfully interact with others.

Taking the time to journal permits you the opportunity to reflect on your thoughts and feelings and to gain better clarity of how self-worth is defined by you.

Any version of self-reflection and introspection can provide a better knowledge of yourself and your interpretation of the world around you.

Self-worth journal prompts can lend to you knowing yourself well and valuing your uniqueness in a deeper and more impactful way.

You deserve to be valued, and the most important person to know and show your worth is yourself.

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Home Organization Affirmations for When You Don’t Feel Like Organizing

Home Organization Affirmations for When You Don’t Feel Like Organizing

Home organization can seem perfect in theory, but be a tedious chore in reality. Putting your focus on the outcome that you want can make the steps you take to get there easier.   Using affirmations throughout the process can be a big part of keeping the right focus.

All too often you lose momentum before you start.  When you see around your home what seems like an endless sea of mini-projects, papers, and random paraphernalia, it’s daunting. 

And when nothing has a home in your home, you can feel like everything has taken over your house.

This may be the perfect motivation to have a beautiful home.  But it may not necessarily be the motivation to organize your way there.

When you don’t feel like cleaning or organizing, before you push through and do it anyway, pause and get mentally prepared.

Don’t let your mental energy be yet another hurdle to jump through. 

Instead, let your mind motivate you to get your to-do list done.  And feel good all the way through your organization journey.

Use these 10 Home Organization Affirmations for When You Don’t Feel Like Organizing to get you from overwhelmed to overjoyed in your living space.

First, Why Do You Need Affirmations?

Affirmations are an excellent way to focus and build intention with your thoughts. 

So often the mind will run from topic to topic seemingly without pause.  And scattered between subjects there can be a number of negative and demotivating thoughts.

Allowing the negative thoughts to run without borders can cause your energy to run away with it.  And when you are looking to build your motivation for action, you find that are already mentally drained.

Affirmations can replace a negative train of thought and energize your mind with positive momentum.

With the right words in mind, you can find yourself hopeful, inspired, optimistic, and generally in a good mood.

This vitalized mental status can be the perfect frame of mind to make your vision and your actions come to life.

Why Do You Need Home Organization Affirmations?

Affirmations for home organization can infuse power thoughts and actions into an otherwise mentally draining project. 

Organizing causes tons of thinking.

What do you want to do with this? 

How do you create a home for that? 

To organize well you are:

  1. being intentional and thoughtful about your needs
  2. creating the flow of your home, and
  3. making long-lasting changes for order and harmony for you and your family 

All of this may be new and therefore require a completely new train of thought!

With new trains of thought, come even more thinking, and therefore even more opportunity for negativity and self-sabotage.

As soon as you are unable to create an immediate solution for your clutter and chaos, you could be faced with thoughts of your ineptness for the entire project.

Home organization affirmations help you to keep the right thoughts about your abilities and capabilities at the forefront of your mind.

You do have the ability to create a new order for your home.  You are completely capable to create or research new ideas for order and put them into action.

Home organization affirmations help to sustain the right thoughts in your mind regardless if you are at the easiest or toughest part of your project.

What Are the Benefits of Home Organization?

More than having a picture-perfect home, home organization helps to reduce the clutter in your mind.

Your surroundings are a reflection of you and your thinking.  When you are disorganized in your home, you carry more than physical clutter in it. 

Your true homebase is within. 

When you are constantly in search of something you have lost or you find your eyes land on a project to be done, you are simultaneously exerting mental energy.

Mental energy or attention on unnecessary subjects can be significantly reduced when you know where things are, know where to put them, or lay eyes on empty spaces instead of clutter.

With a less taxed mind, you can then have opportunity to enjoy the peace within your home and in your thoughts.

It will be easier to take inventory of what you are grateful for in your home.

You will find more often your home to represent peace and relaxation.

Less distraction, less stress, and less wasted mental energy all contribute to your peaceful, focused, and clear mind. 

And with a positive mental state, you have room to be more creative, more innovative, more inspired, or simply more relaxed. 

How Do You Use Affirmations?

Affirmations have many applications. 

Be open to experimenting and find what works for you when using them.

The simplest method is to find or create a statement that has positive meaning to you and to read or say the statement outloud.

You can repeat the statement once or repeatedly.  The number of times said is not as important as the statement becoming your focus in the moment.

When you have a list of affirmations, you can read them all at once.  You can also choose to take one or two from the list and to repeat them as if a mantra.

When doing difficult or tedious tasks, it can be helpful to repeat your chosen affirmations while performing your task to keep your mental energy aligned with what you are doing.

You can also choose to make ceremony with your affirmations. 

You can choose to consciously and intentionally clear your mind before taking any action. Close your eyes and perform a few deep breaths. 

Once you find yourself centered, you can light a candle or take a moment to write your affirmations to signify a start to your new thinking.

Then take time to read your affirmations, settling on every word, and purposefully aligning yourself with the meaning to you behind each statement.

When you have completed this, you are now ready to take on your tasks with the proper mental energy with your mind and actions in full alignment.

Take time to learn what works for you and practice using your home organization affirmations when creating the environment you aspire to have.

Happy Organizing!

10 Home Organization Affirmations for When You Don’t Feel Like Organizing

Keeping a positive state of mind and being kind to yourself as you live your life’s journey can be tough at times. But the rewards can be significant.

What do you do to keep a strong positive mindset? Do you use affirmations or just muscle through when you need to get things done? Share your story in the Comments Section.

Need a little more happy thoughts inspiration, take a look at these posts:

The Perfect Self Love Tips to Change Your Life

7 Ways to Create Balance in Your Imbalanced Life

How to Make Your Dreams Come True: A Planning Guide

How to Energize and Maximize Your Giving Spirit

How to Energize and Maximize Your Giving Spirit

The Giving Spirit takes its form in many ways and inspires many people.  We all can use inspiration at times when living such busy lives to find ways to energize and maximize our Giving Spirit.

When you want to be more and give more, your heart can be in the right place and your mind can be all over the place.

You can find yourself saying that you would do more if you only knew how or where to go. 

It seems easy for some but the reality is:

Not All People Know Exactly What to Do. 

It is the reason why donating money at a supermarket cash register or contributing through auto-deduction at work is effective. 

When you don’t know what to do, you try to at least attempt to do something.

When you are looking for ways to fire up your Giving Spirit, know that you can energize the gift of giving in 100s of ways. 

To maximize your Giving Spirit, you need only a little ingenuity and a willing heart to make more happen.

Here are a few ideas that can inspire you at any time of year to energize and maximize your Giving Spirit.

Give Time

There are many organizations that look for helping hands to reach their charitable goals. 

Food Banks need support to organize and box foods to share with families within the communities. 

While we may live in a land full of abundance there are still many who do not have access to meals day-to-day. 

Providing meal access is both through food donation and food material organization and distribution.  Helping hands help to keep the process chain moving.

Food Pantries and Homeless Shelters and Soup Kitchens all collect and distribute food donations.

They also provide locations for hungry people with limited to no resources to go to receive prepared meals. 

If you have skills in the kitchen or are willing to learn from other trained staff, you can be of expert help.

In your giving of your time, you are also giving gifts of health and nutrition throughout your community. 

Give Talent

There are more than 1 million non-profit and charitable organizations in the U.S. and more than 10 million in the world. 

The opportunity to provide support through the donation of your skills and abilities is vast.

Your interest to help may only require an email inquiry or phone call.

Research non-profits in your area to see where they are.  Then contact them to see what they may need that you can provide.

Now is not the time to be modest, embrace what you know and be open to sharing. 

Here are a few ideas to get your Giving Spirit in gear:

  • If you know marketing, you may be able to help support advertising a fundraising campaign
  • Have talent with business writing? You may be able to support creating grant applications
  • If you know recruiting, you may be able to teach out-of-work individuals how to create a resume or how to interview
  • Are you a local leader? You may be able to mentor local students studying in your field
  • If you know accounting, you may be able to teach a budgeting class or help an organization improve their bookkeeping processes
  • As an experienced event planner, you may be able to support organizing a charitable drive
  • If you are a community or public servant, you may be able to help with local organization networking and resource sharing
  • And, if you can simply read, you may be able to spend time reading to an elderly person in hospice or reading to a children’s group at a shelter

The options are endless and the leverage of your skills to support non-profit organization needs could be of tremendous benefit to many.

Give Materials

We are constantly surrounded by things and not everything that surrounds us is something that we need. 

Sharing items from our homes, our workplaces, our vehicles, or purchasing items to share is a beautiful way to make accessible useful items that others may need far more than we do.

Donating goods and materials is not only of benefit to the people or organizations looking for support.

It also is a tremendous way to honor the various products that we are able to craft, make, construct, and use to enhance our lives. 

Look at your old possessions as once needed, useful, decorative, or simply required for your daily living. 

If today, you no longer require these items then give thanks for what they once provided you and then pass on the blessing.

Many items, any items, new or gently used can be of a true gift to someone in need. 

When thinking of what to give, focus on the need and be inspired

Download Infographic here

Give Kindness

Often when thinking of giving, we look to serve the most desperate in our communities. 

This is our Giving Spirit coming to life and shining light where it is most needed.

However, we do not have to go in search of those in need to give life to the art of giving.

We instill a Giving Spirit when we naturally give to anyone we see at any moment of the day. 

Do not hesitate or wait for an organized event in order to give of your heart:

  • Open a door for the next person you can
  • Pay the toll for the person behind you in line
  • Carry the bags for the next person you see who may be carrying too many
  • Offer help to your co-worker at work just because
  • Visit a neighbor with flowers, a plant, or a dessert
  • Acknowledge the good job of those who can sometimes get passed by like a cashier or a gas station attendant
  • Ask your child’s school if you can participate in a preschool, kindergarten, or 1st grade class by reading a book or talking about your work
  • Write an email or text to a relative or friend randomly and share why you think they are special
  • Say thank you to those who keep your community in order like your garbage collector or postal carrier

These may seem like trivial actions and not exactly as if you are giving. 

But the gift of kindness is how the Giving Spirit is born and grows in all of us.

It is when we show that the needs of others outweigh our own that we spark feelings of gratitude and love between us. 

As a giver, we are thankful to give and as a receiver, we are thankful to receive.

This Giving Spirit exchange is far bigger than the action between two people, it is the energy, emotion, and impression that we share that can literally span across the globe.

It is in the spirit of giving that we remember that we are a vast community across the planet, living together, supporting each other, and thriving together.

Energize your Giving Spirit every single day by looking for ways to maximize what giving can be in every moment you can.   

Do you have other ideas to spark the Giving Spirit? If so, please comment below and share with everyone looking to give a bit more today!

And Don’t Forget: Download the Charitable Giving Infographic for future reference.

In a feel-good mood? Keep the energy moving. Here are some other posts you may like:

The Perfect Self Love Tips to Change Your Life

How to Create Your At-Work Sanctuary

7 Ways to Create Balance

Are You Broken Because Your Life Is Not Balanced?

Are You Broken Because Your Life Is Not Balanced?

You need to live a balanced life. Or at least that is what you say to yourself. But where did that idea come from?

Somewhere the narrative created an equation of happy life equals balanced life. There is nothing wrong with that math, except no one shared how to solve the equation.

You can say, “I want to live a balanced life now so that I can be happy now”. 

But what do you do next?

Think of all the questions that come with solving this mystery:

  • What if you don’t know how to become balanced?
  • Can you learn to be balanced or are you just born with it?
  • How do you control the balance in your life if everything that makes you feel imbalanced is someone or something other than you?
  • When do you know that you have achieved balance and, if you do, how do you keep it?
  • Can you live a happy life and not be in balance?

These are just a sample of what comes to mind around the subject of happiness and balance.  The good news is that you are not broken, off track, or a bad person if you don’t know how to answer these questions.

The real answer to all of these questions (and even the ones not asked) is that there is no one answer

So What is Balance?

Based on who you are and where you are on your life’s journey, at times there can be no answer at all.

The truth is that lack of clarity and lack of answers can make being in balance just seem impossible. Therefore it’s the equation that is broken, not you.

But that doesn’t mean that you should just abandon being in balance.

Like anything in life that you may want to pursue, there is the potential in having joy in the journey and in achieving the milestones along the way.

Balance is the opportunity for more joy, more satisfaction, and more zest out of life. If you believe that this version of life is worth pursuing then, yes, you want to have balance in your life.

And it is possible.

Let’s create a milestone together and explore the possibility of a balanced life.

Create Possibility by Definition

You are the only one who can create the definition of balance for your life.

You are the master carpenter erecting this structure in your life.

This empowered position is an excellent starting point toward gaining the joy in your life that you want.  And it is the kick-off point to establishing the balance you want to have.

You get to decide. 

Balance for you can mean that you are able to well juggle the obligations of family, work, personal health, and finances. 

It could also mean that you are able to be equally mindful of your goals for your physical well-being, your educational pursuits, and your spiritual priorities. 

You may want to have a fabulous career, raise a beautiful family, and also travel the world.

Life overflows with potential and opportunity.  You decide what options are the ones that make sense to you and for you.

Choose which life experiences lend to what you are and which ones pull away from where you want to be. You do not have to do everything and you do not have to make all things a priority.

By participating in selected life experiences, you have the opportunity for defining your happiness.  And you decide the amount of time, attention, and focus you dedicate to the experiences that you want to have.

In this way, you have defined balance by what you do and what you elect not to do. When you place the most focus on what you love you have a better chance of experiencing balance.

How Does Balance Feel

Sometimes words just don’t do justice to describing a feeling.  Feelings are meant to be felt.

Trying to define balance as a feeling can therefore be difficult.  However, it is important to define the feeling of balance for yourself so that you can recognize when you have achieved it.

Balance can take on many characteristics based on what life experiences are at any moment.

Defining and then prioritizing experiences that you love produces a myriad of good feelings.

  • Go to bed on time and wake up feeling rested
  • Complete the work you planned in your day and leave work feeling productive. 
  • Spend time with your kids playing ball in the backyard and after you’re feeling energized and thankful
  • Step out of your 20-minute shower feeling fresh and relaxed
Feel good music just feels good

You take all of these parts and pieces and reflect upon them before you go to sleep.  And you say to yourself, you had a good day.

The summary may be that you simply feel good.  But if asked, you may also say that you feel balanced.

The Feeling Definition of Balance

The sensation of

  • being in flow
  • achieving your goals
  • satisfying others’ needs
  • enjoying the people you love
  • gaining your wants and desires, and
  • receiving unexpected but pleasant surprises

All of these and more can feel like balance to you. 

Even if everything happens at once when the net outcome is plus the feeling of balance is the outcome.

Defining and feeling the experiences that create joy is how you define and feel being in balance.

Understanding the Role of Imbalance

Imbalance in life is not exactly the opposite of balance. 

If balance equals good feelings and happy experiences, being out of balance does not necessarily equal bad feelings and unhappy events.

Knowing this can hopefully relieve a little pressure in reaching the goal of balance.

Perfect balance is not a requirement for happiness and you don’t want it to be.  Freeing yourself from this expectation provides more options, more choice.

You know many people who are intentionally and blissfully out of balance all the time.  If you don’t know them personally, you have seen them on tv. You may be one of them!

You may wonder how someone so out of whack can still be so joyfully intact. Are they just ignoring their pain?

Imbalance Is Better Than You Think

Lack of balance can be chaotic or fun.  It can be spontaneous or irrational. When you realize that life is never perfect you can appreciate the perfect chaos that is life.

In this way, you can see the benefit to all aspects of life and not fall to pieces when imbalance shows its ugly head.

  • Dinner burned. Perfect time for pizza night!
  • Boss created a new project in the middle of your day. Perfect opportunity to learn something new and abandon your same old boring tasks!
  • Left your wallet at home when trying to checkout at the store. Guess you’ll spend a little more time listening to your favorite song in the car!

The bottom line is you dictate what imbalance is to you. 

Imbalance can be embraced as a welcomed part of life.  It can be an opportunity for gratitude in all that life has to offer, the ups and the downs, and everything in between.

Good Things Can Actually Come From Bad Experiences

The reality is that living life imbalanced can be a significant part of achieving happiness.

When you are cramming for an exam or prepping for a major presentation, you may not sleep for 2 days, barely eat, and talk to no one.  But the outcome of this extreme focus may be the biggest accomplishment you have ever experienced.

A relationship gone bad can make you laser-focused on the type of romance most important to you.  A job you must quit can create a desire for a business you must build.

When big transitions happen, you may first only see the pain in the situation.  And that’s okay.

Your biggest deviations from balance can inspire your most substantial dreams for blissful existence

You can be on top of the world tomorrow just because you allowed yourself to live in imbalance today.

Understand when imbalance can serve you, educate you, and even motivate you to become more.  Your living in imbalance can be the way that you define your goal of balance with better clarity and increased certainty.

Managing You Through Imbalance

There is another side to imbalance.

That’s the imbalance burn that sets the whole forest on fire.

The times when you become consumed in any one area of your life and feel as if you completely neglected all other priorities.

  • Your family suffers because your work has become your everything. 
  • Your relationship suffers because you have placed your children on a pedestal above everything else. 
  • Your own health wanes because you have to make sure that everyone else in your life gets your time and energy.

When you abandon balance for obsession on any subject for too long, you drain the essence from all the other aspects of life that bring you joy.

The assortment of pleasures that life has to offer is there for you to make the most out of your life.  When you sacrifice the all for the one, you simultaneously choose to limit your access to life’s pleasures.

Gaining joy, pleasure, happiness, satisfaction, and fulfillment in life is what gives life its purpose. 

Limiting your access to these treasures can make life feel like a purposeless burden.

The reality is that life may call upon you to be imbalanced at times.  A sick child, a serious work obligation, a parent in need, an almost foreclosed home, these are not the times to worry over your life balance. 

Know the difference of when imbalance is required or an unhealthy option drawn. 

Seeking Imbalance is Walking a Backward Path

Some parts of life demand acting with urgency and treating parts of your life as an emergency.  But there are also times when imbalance can become an unhealthy habit through patterned avoidance.

The other priorities in your life can be damaged or difficult and not an immediate source of happiness for you. 

To avoid having to confront the challenge of correcting the problem, you may elect to be imbalanced and to focus all of your attention where you feel that you can most easily feel better.  

Initially, this is not a poor choice or a bad option. Placing attention on the areas of life that provide you joy can lead to feelings of balance that can eventually be shared across all subjects.

You are allowed to fill your cup in any way that you choose that puts you in the best space to live your best life.

But perpetual avoidance can become an addiction.

Living Only in Safe Spaces Can Be Another Way That Life Becomes Limited. 

If you only live to work because this is where you succeed and then work becomes dysfunctional, you lose your only source of joy. 

You may look to your work to fulfill the other parts of life that you failed to invest in putting in balance. 

In this case, your work cannot love you like a spouse or guide you like a parent.  But you may misplace these needs in unhealthy places because you have avoided nurturing other aspects of your life.

Purposeful imbalance due to obsessive pain avoidance can lead to a very unhappy life.

Creating ways to balance life through a diversity of joyful outlets can make finding balance a much easier mission to tackle.  Even when some areas of life need a little work, focusing on the prospect of a better condition can create joy in the process.

Avoiding a problem may seem like a resolution but can lead away from the bigger picture of a better and more balanced life.

Living a Balanced Life

Now that you have defined your balance, your imbalance, and gained clarity of purpose and feeling, it’s time to live what you know.

Living as balanced is an everyday adventure. 

Take time to explore and identify the different parts of life that you see as a priority. 

Intentionally set as priority those aspects of life that bring the most joy and happiness, even if that means a little work involved to get them to their fullest potential.

Take pride in yourself when you have chosen imbalance as a way to propel yourself into a more favorable place.  Remember it is okay to trade a little pain for a lot of gains.

Be mindful to not let your imbalance tip the scales and take you to a negative place.  Too much of a good thing can be bad, and too much of a bad thing can be devastating.

Find ways to fill your cup, regain your focus, and live life with purpose.

You choose if a balanced life is the type of life that you want to live on purpose.  But know that there 100% can be a purpose to living a balanced life when you choose it.

Remember, you are not broken if balance is not your life today, but you can decide today if you want to be balanced.

Related Article: 7 Ways to Create Balance in Your Imbalanced Life

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7 Ways to Create Balance in Your Imbalanced Life

7 Ways to Create Balance in Your Imbalanced Life

Create balance in your life and live a better life. Seems simple enough.

It is energizing to live each day in flow. It is empowering to feel that no matter what comes there is a comfort that awaits you.

Knowing that you are in balance gives both a sense of relaxation and excited anticipation to any day. 

However, imbalance is also a part of life. At times it can seem like the only part of life that you are living. 

The days strung together when it feels that nothing is in flow.

The moments when nothing goes as planned and the worst scenario seems to just keep showing up. The days when you just want the day to stop and start over.

Know that you don’t have to work to remove the experience of imbalance to have a good life.

You couldn’t even if you wanted to.

So instead make peace with your times of imbalance and learn ways to regain balance once it has been lost.

Take a look at these 7 Ways to Create Balance when imbalance has become your way of life. See what you may be able to add to your list of remedies to put you in a better place:

Grace | Positive Speak | Self Chivalry | Rest | Sacred Space | Nature | Special Connections

1. A Little Grace Goes a Long Way

Sometimes the easiest way to regain balance is to release trying to have it. (Yes, you read that right).

Sometimes life is just hard

Give yourself grace and permit yourself to simply be human when things fall apart

Be angry, cry, feel defeated and frustrated. It is hard to skip past the ugly parts of imbalance when your emotions are running strong and your focus is blurred. So let it be.

Create a starting point of acceptance before you forge ahead trying manically to feel better.

Acknowledge where you are.

This gives you the opportunity to actually pause and see where things have gone wrong. This is the point where your knowledge of self becomes your power.

Otherwise, you can be lost in your emotion and directionless in your actions inspired by your discomfort.

Too often, you can be painfully in imbalance and not even realize it.

In these moments you turn on yourself and everyone and everything around you. Spinning your wheels you try to fight or fix everything and that is just too big of a challenge for anyone to take on.

When everything is out of control, maybe it’s time to stop trying to control it

Instead of looking for the world to be fixed so that you feel better, focus on bringing yourself to a better place – in time. Own your personal state and feel empowered that you know yourself enough to realize when you are simply momentarily off.

Self Knowledge is Not Wasted Effort When Working to Feel Better

Imbalance is a part of life and one that you and most others will experience frequently.  It is not a failure to be imbalanced.

But it is a failed assessment to believe that your current disposition is somehow wrong.

The goal to be in constant balance is one that can never be achieved.  So let it go.

An attainable goal is to seek more self-awareness. Note when you fall from your balance and develop ways that consistently help you through your challenges. 

Know yourself enough to truly believe that you can get through this

Even with imbalance there are positive gains when you grow to build more and more trust in yourself.

You will learn that you can find ways to resolve your life’s conflicts and bring balance back to your life.

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2. Say the Right Words for the Right Outcome

Words are powerful.  Therefore, there is good reason to choose your words wisely or suffer the consequence of self-created imbalance. 

As if a mantra, you can at times repeat over and over again all the negatives about you or your experiences.

  • This is a horrible day. 
  • Why is everything going wrong? 
  • Here we go again! 
  • I’m an idiot. 
  • I can make a mess of everything!!!

The list of imbalanced words and phrases has no end and so with it no end to the problems that come with it. 

What you say to you matters. Think before you speak

The words that we repeat become the reality that we live. When we speak negativity to ourselves then a moment of discomfort can become a full day of regret.  

Change your self-talk and live differently. 

You are the key to the life that you manifest and your words are instruments in the making of it. 

In the midst of imbalance, you may not be able to change what you are facing. But you can change the words you say, think, or repeat.

Choose to soothe yourself instead of aggravating your frazzled nerves more.

Start small but purposefully. Try affirming to yourself, “it will be okay” or, “I know I am doing my best”, or “it can only get better from here”.  

Better yet, sing a song that you enjoy or recite a prayer or poem that brings you peace. 

Kind words and a smile can be life-changing

Choose words with emotions that represent where you want to be even if you feel very different in the present.

  • “I’m far from happy now, but I know that things will get better and I will get happier
  • “I can’t wait until I’m excited to wake up in the morning”
  • “When I get home I am going to have a peaceful and relaxing night. I need it”

Say the words that you need to hear to become the balance you need to have.  

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3. Champion Your Own Chivalry

Protect your needs for well-being and your right to balance

To take care of another before oneself is only one form of chivalry. 

Do not hesitate to become the champion of mastered courtesy and honor for yourself.

Put a gallant effort toward defending your right to peace when imbalance has seemingly taken over your life.  

You can be your own knight in shining armor. Take the necessary actions to smite the sources of the imbalance that confront you. 

Make choices that honor your personal needs for importance, priority, and self-care. And be proud to take your balance as a reward.

You are allowed to pull away from what drains you and relax back into focus

If you can leave work early, do it. 

If you can leave a phone call unanswered, do it. 

If simply going to the bathroom for a moment of peace is the only solitude you can capture, take it.

Give yourself the freedom to stop the world if only for a moment.

Your life shouldn’t feel like bondage

Make decisions that serve you and become an ambassador of your sanctity and sanity.

When life becomes too much it is okay to pause what you can so that you are in a better place to handle what comes. 

Be chivalrous to yourself regularly and you may thwart many occasions of imbalance on the horizon.

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4. The Requirement of Replenishment

Within the most basic human functions lays the most critical of needs, replenishment.

Rest, relaxation, and sleep each serves to provide replenishment to the body.

Recharging your battery gives you the energy to stay strong when you need it most

Replenishment of the body secures a foundation whereby you are in the best condition to perform at your highest capacity. 

The pressures, stresses, and frustrations of the day are regular occurrences that place a demand upon your physical and even your mental disposition. 

Replenishment is a defense against these attacks on your balance and provides you the strength to carry on.  

When feeling imbalanced examine your rest, relaxation, and sleep schedule, and if poor, address immediately and with urgency. 

Fighting the internal war of fatigue will invite imbalance and potentially subject you to even more, leaving you without the strength to find your way to norm.  

Take Your Rest Before It Overtakes You

Replenishment is more than sleep, though getting the length and depth of rest through sleep is important. Other forms of replenishment exist too:

While replenishment will not always cure imbalance by itself, it can provide you with centeredness that can support your return-to-balance journey.

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5. Own Your Space

When your whole world has toppled and there is confusion everywhere you look, finding respite in your sanctuary away from the storm can immediately make you feel better.

Create a space that provides you balance, even if only temporarily.

10 minutes of peace and positive focus can feel like a miracle

You may find that at work, it is your desk, your locker, even your screensaver. 

You can place positive messages, photos of family, or a memento that has special meaning to you.

Create a space for your inspired peaceful vision and gain the power to provide calm through your line of sight.

Let a simple image transport you to another place

At home, it may be your bedroom, a spare room, a small corner of your basement, or even your laundry room where you can place a candle, incense, or a bouquet of flowers.

Simplicity can bring balance in an instant

Visiting your sacred space or creating one for the first time can represent giving to yourself when it feels like the whole world is only taking. 

Having a display of items that have special meaning solely to you can provide a sense of grounding and control in an otherwise chaotic existence.

Your sacred space is whatever you want it to be but it’s yours

Imbalance can seem to walk with you no matter where you go, but having a space for peace can provide an opportunity to release your burdens and to step into balance when needed.

Keep your sanctuary intact at all times, never commingling your pressure points with your peaceful place.

This pattern of separation will help to train your mind, body, and spirit that once you have connected with your sanctuary all is well and balance is again accessible to you.

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6. Connect with Nature

No matter the season or time of day, it may be a perfect opportunity to step into nature when you feel that imbalance abounds.

Peace and balance is everywhere you need it to be

There is almost always an opportunity to experience nature if you choose to prioritize the experience. 

When the walls feel as if they are closing in and the place you stand feels unstable, take time to walk outside. Experience fresh air, solid ground, and the expansive view of the sky. It can be the best way to regain stability.

Look to nature when you need a balancing experience

Nature represents simplicity but also manifests in substantial ways through different forms of life and that which supports life. 

Water, sun, insects, soil, trees, flowers, grass, and animals, our world is surrounded with the sights and sounds of balance and natural synchronicity in abundance.

Not only can the mere experience of nature create a flow into balance but also the observation of the world’s simplicity in motion. 

  • Watch the movement of life around you, birds in the trees, squirrels running across the ground, people busseling to their destinations
  • Feel the breeze against your face on a hot or brisk day
  • Take in the unique smells of flowers and trees
  • Listen to water and its rhythmic tones whether from a nearby creek or a public fountain
  • Take a break from flourescent lights and cellphone screens and see the world through natural light

Allow the problems that you face to become small in comparison to the insurmountable wonder that is life on this planet.

Sit and take in the beauty that abounds

Go out and experience the abundance of eternal balance that surrounds you. And reassure yourself that your personal balance is literally only steps away at any moment.

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7. Find Your Tribe

There is no rule that your road to balance must be traveled alone. So when you find yourself in the thrusts of imbalance make use of your resources.

Surround yourself with loved ones when you need it most

If you do not have that tried and true relationship with a family member, friend, or co-worker today then start investing time now into building these relationships.

When you are fortunate enough to have special people in your life, trust in the strength of your relationship that they are willing and wanting to support you when you need the help.

To have loyal companions who will always have a positive disposition and a helping hand to lend is a treasure.

Good people with good dispositions are great resources to have.

When your path has gotten too dim for you to find your way home alone, a good friend will act as a lighthouse across your dark sea and guide you back to balance.

Let your friends be a source of healing for their benefit and yours.

When you don’t have the energy to create your peace, a good friend will offer encouragement and insight. While it is important to be your own source of comfort when facing imbalance, acknowledge when you need help.

A burden shared between two people can be much lighter weight than a crushing problem held by one

Remember also, you may not always have access to live support every time you need it. Late-night hours, travel, or just life can make it hard to connect with family and friends at times.

So it is important to also build a tribe of indirect connections and influencers to guide your journey toward balance.

The vehicles of peace are endless. Search for support and know that it is always there.

These resources can come in the form of musicians, artists, writers, podcasters, YouTubers, bloggers, and more. At a moment’s notice, no matter the time day or night, you can tap into their message and be transported to a better place.

  • Listen to music. Create playlists designed to lift your spirits when needed
  • Read a book or your favorite highlighted passage
  • Watch a motivational video or a heartwarming movie
  • Learn a new way to ease your stress or bring order to your life

Your favorite artists, creators, and entertainers can be your lifeline in bad times.

Curate your tribe with care and reap the rewards of partnered effort towards balance. Invest in creating your team for balance and see the fruits of your labor flourish with positive connections and peace.

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While imbalance is a part of life and not always an enjoyable part, balance also exists. 

The path of moving from the discomfort of imbalance to better balance can be challenging. Find comfort in knowing that any struggle is only temporary by nature. 

The goal then is to make your way through the tougher times. Ready your tools and resources so you can be in better balance and, overall, in a better state of mind and life experience.

Take command of your ability to create balance in your life. And know that no amount of imbalance can keep you from living the quality of life you choose to live.  

When you prepare ahead for the imbalance you know to come, you can be in the best position to bring yourself back to the balance that keeps you whole.

Remember Your Way Back to Balance

The balance that you seek is in your hands to create. You will always feel better in time.

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Have you found the perfect way to face imbalance in your daily life? Share your method in the Comments section. We can always use another great idea for peace.